MILWAUKEE — A Milwaukee man is sharing his traumatic experience after what he thought was a dating app meet-up turned into a violent robbery, hoping his story will help keep others in the LGBTQ+ community safe.
Davie Hackbarth is still shaken by one of the most traumatic experiences of his life. In December, he was scrolling on the dating app Grindr when he connected with someone and decided to meet in person.
"I think that I was just pretty lonely," Hackbarth said.
Despite noticing red flags like a lack of pictures on the man's profile, Hackbarth drove to the address provided.
"It was well lit. It seemed like a residential area that, you know, could be trusted," Hackbarth said.
The man came to Hackbarth's car door, and the two began walking down an alley to what Hackbarth thought was the man's home. That's when the situation took a dangerous turn.
Watch: Milwaukee man warns of dating app dangers after violent robbery: 'It was do or die'
"I started to get a really bad feeling, and I stopped in my tracks, and that's when he pulled out a gun," Hackbarth said.
A second person appeared and cornered him. Hackbarth screamed for help, but no one came. The suspects demanded his phone and password.
"I've never had a gun pointed at me before... I kinda realized it was do or die," Hackbarth said. "He said, give us the passcode, or we'll kill you. So it was pretty terrifying," Hackbarth said.
Hackbarth was hit in the face with the gun, beaten, and kicked multiple times. Once he handed over his phone, he was able to escape and drive to a nearby gas station, where he called police.
Milwaukee police say they've seen a recent spike in robberies connected to dating apps, particularly targeting the LGBTQ+ community.
"It made me feel really sad for my community to find out that we were being targeted through these apps," Hackbarth said.
Hackbarth wants stricter verification processes from Grindr and other dating apps to help prevent similar crimes from happening to others.
For those who use dating apps, police and Hackbarth suggest meeting in public places, telling someone where you're going, and being wary of profiles without many photos. Hackbarth emphasizes that people should prioritize safety, not shame.
"Just know you're not alone if this happens to you, there's a lot of shame in these dating apps and I don't think there should be," Hackbarth said.
The investigation is ongoing. Anyone with information on this case is asked to contact Milwaukee Police.
Before meeting someone from a dating app in person, Milwaukee police recommend the following safety precautions:
General safety tips:
- Tell a trusted person where you’re going and who you’re meeting
- Choose a public location for the meet-up
- Avoid sharing personal or financial information
- Stay sober
Red flags to watch for online:
- Profiles with only one or two photos, which could indicate a fake or bot account
- Matches who refuse to talk on the phone before meeting
- Vague or evasive answers to basic questions
- Individuals who aren’t local and insist on meeting in private locations, such as hotels or residences
Additional guidance from the Milwaukee Police Department is available at mkepdpio.org/online-dating-safety.
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