MILWAUKEE — Nearly 30 years ago, Milwaukee native Janice Toy made one of the biggest decisions of her life. She came out to her mother as transgender at just 18 years old. She remembers it like it was yesterday.
"She said that she already knew. My whole life she said she knew that I was different, she was basically waiting for me to tell her," said Toy. "She said no matter what, I was always going to be her child."
She says that acceptance was all she needed to fully embrace herself. Over the years, she's become one of Milwaukee's most legendary drag queen performers and advocate for the LGBTQ+ community.
"I opened my house to other girls who were just starting to come out, and whose families didn't really accept them," said Toy. "I'd let them stay with me and get themselves together so that's why a lot of times they consider me to be their mother in the community."
But sometimes coming out to families, friends, or loved ones isn't always easy, especially for people of color.
"In Black communities, there's a high rate of non-acceptance," said mental health expert, Dr. Lia Knox.
A recent study noted that since the pandemic, there's been a rise in the rate of suicidal thoughts and attempts by people of color in the LGBTQ+ community. That's why during National Coming Out Day, advocates are stressing the message of love and acceptance, and that it's okay to be who you are.
"You have to be strong within yourself and be able to accept it within yourself," said Knox. "We have to be open. We have to be open to people in general. We have to be open to different love."
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org.
